Things have been a bit rocky around here the past couple of days, and "Blue Christmas" is really speaking volumes to me at the moment. My wise friend has diagnosed me with a case of grief over the passage of time and childhood, and she is probably right about that. I would maybe feel a smidgen better if I didn't keep beating myself up over the fact that I did so much to hasten its passage. I am trying not to dwell. Unfortunately, I am an expert dweller, so not a lot of luck with that.
I have decided, though, that I need to try and be a bit more jolly instead of my usual grinchy self. I don't know why but the holiday season really sends me around the bend; ask anyone who knows me. This year is no exception and probably worse than normal given how crappy I feel about how we handled Terzo's questions. I am trying though. Trying to be jolly around him, trying to give him the time and attention and specialness that he is craving this time of year. We spent the last few days decorating the house and shopping for his gifts for others and generally getting ready for Christmas, including making crafts for the special people in his life. He seems to be doing OK. It's me that's completely cracked.