Things have been a bit rocky around here the past couple of days, and "Blue Christmas" is really speaking volumes to me at the moment. My wise friend has diagnosed me with a case of grief over the passage of time and childhood, and she is probably right about that. I would maybe feel a smidgen better if I didn't keep beating myself up over the fact that I did so much to hasten its passage. I am trying not to dwell. Unfortunately, I am an expert dweller, so not a lot of luck with that.
I have decided, though, that I need to try and be a bit more jolly instead of my usual grinchy self. I don't know why but the holiday season really sends me around the bend; ask anyone who knows me. This year is no exception and probably worse than normal given how crappy I feel about how we handled Terzo's questions. I am trying though. Trying to be jolly around him, trying to give him the time and attention and specialness that he is craving this time of year. We spent the last few days decorating the house and shopping for his gifts for others and generally getting ready for Christmas, including making crafts for the special people in his life. He seems to be doing OK. It's me that's completely cracked.
So sad for you Kris. So many struggle with the Holidays. No good trying to tell you to cut yourself some slack.
ReplyDeleteI pray that with time (and age) you will be kind to yourself.
You are a fantastic wife mother and all around person!
Big HUGS!
In our family it seems to be my job to try and keep everybody's emotions even keel to lesson the effects of the Christmas Blues that seem to hit the kids at about 10:12 a.m. on Christmas Day. All that anticipation, hopes, dreams and wonderment --- really it is just another day and I might still ask them to put their shoes away and we still need to do chores and you never really get what you wanted because being happy with what you have is really really hard for any age.
ReplyDeleteY'know that Jolly ole elf thing coulda gone either way. If it had continued he may have been even more upset, some kids find it fun, some feel duped. I'm guessing he is just working it all out in his own way/time.
ReplyDeletePeace be with you my friend, you're in my prayers!
Mrs. C
It's pretty amazing, but kids survive in spite of their parents. Hey, look at how well ours turned out!
ReplyDeleteKris,
ReplyDeleteAh, the wisdom of hindsight. I always took comfort in the fact that I was the only mom my kids had ever known! I hope you will find much to celebrate in this Christmas season and in the daily blessings of the wonderful family you and LSH have created.